Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas '08

Christmas eve was eventful. I'd been in Seattle overnight for an appointment on Christmas eve during the day. It snowed like no body's business again.

The intent was to get my appointment done and head back up to Vancouver ASAP because my brother and his husband were flying in for a holiday visit. Their flight was late leaving Dallas, and then it was diverted to, drum-roll please, Seattle to take on more fuel.

I was still in Seattle and they were held captive in the big aluminum tube until it was finally allowed to fly north to Vancouver. When you consider taxi, take-off, and gate times, I think their trip from Seattle to Vancouver took longer than my drive in the ice and snow. But they're here now, and I'm here with Ed, and it's all good.

Two unpleasant things happened at the SCCA yesterday. I was 'emergency' scheduled for another transfusion because my numbers are so low. I waited 4 hours for the 'type and cross' and the blood delivery. When the blood finally arrived, IT WAS THE WRONG TYPE. 4 hours wasted and no transfusion! I have to return to Seattle tomorrow. Not good.

The second issue, and I have yet to tell this to my brother (but Ed knows) is that my oncologist, Dr. B. made the following statement. "I'm worried. The graft isn't working."

For the record, I've engrafted, meaning that the graft has taken over my body and apparently killed the tumors. However, the graft doesn't appear to be producing blood cells. Thus, I get growth factor "G" at every visit, and I've been getting transfusions like I had a severed limb.

I like Dr. B. He's not rude, he's simply factual. He tells it like it is without pussy-footing around. There's no pie-in-the-sky pandering and false hope. For him to say, "I'm worried. The graft isn't working." makes me think the graft isn't working and he's worried. (Duh!)

I'm worried. Ed is worried.

Of course, Ed is being positive about it, hoping and maintaining his cheery disposition. He's already investigating my options for another transplant. But i have to be honest. I don't know what to say or do about an option like that, even if it's possible.

Even Jesus was only crucified once.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, I intend that every little cell in your body is healthy and well, and that all the little cells that are supposed to be making pretty new red ones get to work right away - immediately in fact. And I intend this for the highest and best good of all concerned... so be it AND SO IT IS... and I will do Reiki on you daily as back-up or kick-start or whatever those cells need...

Roobeedoo said...

Oh sweetie, it is never ending! Hope it all sorts itself out soon! Hugs, Roobeedoo and FL

Anonymous said...

Wishing you the best outcome...

Anonymous said...

well, that sucks, really sucks. sorry to hear it. you have been through a lot. the uncertainty and lack of control through all of this kind of stuff is enough to drive someone crazy. then again, maybe it is that craziness that allows any of us to survive the insanity of the process... hope ed is doing ok. hugs to both of you.