Look, I'm not here to condemn any of you. I just wanna educate you a little. I know very few of us are trained in the right way to deal with a friend saying "I'm gonna die soon."
Most people say, "I'm sorry."
What the hell are you sorry for? I mean, you didn't do anything, so why apologize? You didn't give it to me, did you?
So here are my suggestions for dealing with the imminent demise of a friend, coworker, man on the street.
1) Be GLAD it's not you. Just don't say it.
2) Appreciate that the news can be life-changing for the victim. Ask how they're holding up emotionally.
3) Recognize that the victim is often worried about his family or a loved one, far beyond his concern for himself.
4) Offer your emotional and spritual support any time they need it.
5) Offer to talk to their spouse, S.O., or kids if needed.
6) Help them with preparations if you're close enough..... these are things families sometimes don't address even in times of inevitability.
7) Recognize that this could happen to anyone at any age. So get right with your family, your friends, and your faith. Do the paperwork and make the hard decisions now. It's not right for you to dump it on the people who are missing you.
Just don't say "I'm sorry."
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This blog is written by and about a guy with an incurable form of cancer. My purpose here isn't to say "woe is me", but to give insight about my thoughts, perspectives, and experiences throughout this adventure. My name is Andre. My partner's name is Ed. I intend to publish on a pretty regular basis here, but Ed might occasionally pop in with his thoughts too.
